So we all know Miranda had her genetically blessed bub the other day. Most of you would have seen the awesome breastfeeding photo where she looked Glowing (bitch stole my Glow!). And some of you would have heard that she updated her blog to say that she had her whopping 9lb 12oz baby boy without any pain relief.
One of the forums I belong to, on finding out how much little Flynn weighed, started a thread comparing baby weights. Nothing bad about that, right? Well that's what I thought until I read it and saw some really strange comments attacking Miranda and other women who had also commented, for saying that they had given birth vaginally (yeah I said vagina, get over it). Their point was that it doesn't matter how a baby is born, as long as it's healthy, and that by being proud of an unmedicated birth they were somehow implying that everyone else was lesser than them.
I have a problem with this - are those that do birth vaginally (with or without medication) now supposed to not share that? Can we not be proud of ourselves? In a world with an alarmingly high caesarian rate and epidural rate, can I not be happy that I managed to birth Tricky "the old fashioned way"?
Does my damaged pelvic floor make me think I'm better than anyone else? Hell no.
It was MY goal and MY achievement and I know MY ideals are different to others'. Just because it's different doesn't make it better (or worse).
I'm not against caesarians. I know they save lives. I'm not even against epidurals - I was offered one and finally said yes only to find out that Tricky was crowning. What I am against is the cascade of interventions and 'scalpel happy' hospitals and obstetricians (and even some midwives in my situation) who are ready to cut open a woman at the drop of a hat.
And because I'm a knowledge junkie I'm against uninformed decisions of any kind.
So I'm going to say it now. Giving birth to Tricky vaginally with no pain medication was the proudest moment of my life. I'm not going to hide that away just because someone else chose to or had to do something different.
It's the same with breastfeeding. Can I not be proud that I'm breastfeeding because someone else can't or chooses not to? Can I not be proud that my saggy pendulous breasts are actually good for something?
Why does this only seem to surround birth and parenting choices? There's enough bloody mother guilt as there is without us creating more.
Can we not, as women, just support each other in the choices we make and stop with the politically correct bullshit for a minute?
Vaginal birth, caesarian birth, breastfed or bottlefed - if it works for you then own it and be proud of it.
