I'm getting kinda bogged down in the emo posts lately... every day I write them, and (almost) every day I relegate it to my drafts folder and flick up a recipe or a pointless vlog to keep the happy happy shiney going.
I choose to fake it til I make it... and will continue to do so until I'm either happy or in a straight jacket. So what have my more emo posts taught me???
1. That Michael Jackson was right when he sung "You are not alone" (I am here with yoooou, though we're far apaaaaaart, you're always in my heaaaaaaart). There is always someone in the same boat as you, experiencing something similar and together you can bitch and moan and not feel so isolated, particularly if you're a SAHM and don't get out much.
2. That when you go totally emo and write all about all the deep, dark, festery secrets inside, your stats will go crazy. Just like rubber neckers passing a car crash, people can't help but have a look... but it's not because they're just masochists (well, some are), it's because people can relate to it and are drawn to it.
3. That when you turn comments off in an effort to not look like you're a comment whore phishing for compliments or reassurance that people will find another way to connect with you. Your twitter feed will explode and you'll get texts and emails pouring in that you want to run away from because you can't handle people being so nice. But then you stop and think how amazing it is that people, some you've never met, care enough to offer support.
4. That whilst writing it out is cathartic, pressing publish is terrifying. You'll wonder if it was the right thing to as you realize that your immediate family, inlaws, friends and old school pals and that PR person you gave your business card to in an effort to get them to notice your blog, now know everything.
5. That it all blows over within a few days and people forget. The next person has their crisis or triumph and the blogosphere moves on to them and takes the (self-inflicted) heat off of you... at which point you'll watch your stats drop back to normal and think "You only love me for my drama, you bastards!"
Do you emo blog? What has it taught you?
Emo blogging scares me. I don't think I've had the courage to push publish on a single emo worthy post yet :)
ReplyDeleteI blog anonymously so I emo all the time. It was a conscious decision I made because I wasn't brave enough to tell the world, he'll, even my family, how I really feel. I'm always in awe of amazing bloggers who can put it all out there and stand proud by their blogs. Kudos to you, love. X
ReplyDeleteI overshare in my diet blog.... but try to restrain myself in my more public one, which is linked to my facebook page. Am considering 'coming out' though and letting others know about the diet one... after all, it's all true. It's all me. Just not the me I usually expose publicly!
ReplyDeleteOccasionally. Sometimes without realising it. *blushes* But other times... cos I need to say it. And that's what my blog is there for. It is also there for self indulgent little poems, pictures of my cats and waffling on about my daughter. :-)
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, the hit count zooms on the emo posts! It's nice to not feel alone, like your the only one whose discovering life is REALLY HARD, nice to have the company, so people's emo posts are good for the soul to read.
You're brave. Full stop. You know who reads, you know what happens when you post them, and yet you still do. I don't. Th\\If my blog was just strangers, sure, but family and friends read. Nuh-uh.
ReplyDeleteI tend to bitch and moan blog rather then EMO blog. I think there is a difference.... x
ReplyDeleteI'm with Mrs Woog in that I tend to bitch more. I think the fact you can push publish - even on just some of the emo posts - is amazing. I wish I had that strength! x
ReplyDeleteI've published a few emo posts in my time - and some of them, I worry, will come back to haunt me. I wish I was smarter about making the blog anonymous, but hindsight is always 20/20 and if I ever really get worried, I can always take them down. Thus far, it's been worthwhile to keep the honesty :) x
ReplyDeleteBabe, I have 168 draft posts full of whine.
ReplyDeleteYou have even read some.
I am pretty sure I could have bought a car with the proceeds if I ever had a damn pay per view ad.
xx
People do love an EMO post. I still need to write them, but many remain unpublished or go up on others' blogs. Because this year, in an attempt to stay closer to finding my happiness and the real Bronnie I'm trying to keep my life lighter and focus on what I do have, not what I don't have. I love all your posts, so feel free to write whatever the hello you want!
ReplyDeleteSometimes - sometimes Ilet them stand, sometimes they stay in draft and at other times I panic and put them back into draft.
ReplyDeleteEither that or I splurge blog hoping they will get hidden amongst the happy shiny stuff or turn them into fiction.
Mostly I wish I hadn't hit publish.
Yanno, I actually don't. *Gasp* Shock horror!
ReplyDeleteThe "emo" stuff I post is actually wayyyyyyy toned down, and usually has lines edited out. You know the lines I'm talking about.
I actually have something with the comments turned off (first time ever) coming up on the blog tomorrow. Well, it's supposed to be. I may back out between now and then. very likely that I do.
Well, that was tomorrow. Blogger had other idea's *sigh*
ReplyDeletewe don't forget. we just stop stalking you and hovering. but we check in and keep in mind to keep in touch.
ReplyDeleteI find that I read so many blogs and that's usually when I should be doing something else., so I'm always in a hurry. If I see that a friend has an emo post up - or a cry for help - I'm going to go there instead of the cookie recipe post another friend has up, not to take pap photos of the car crash, but to give CPR if I can. I think you'll find a lot of people do the same which is why the stats go crazy.
Other days, I go for the cookie posts.
I've written very few emo posts (emosts? emogs?) but I have so many in me and I wonder if I should let them out someday. My MIL reads my blog too much, which is mainly what stops me. the fear of how she'll judge me as a mother... anyway.. blah blah back to you.. love you Glow
I take my hat off to anyone who emo posts.
ReplyDeleteJust because I have so many posts in my drafts folder of an emo nature and I freak thinking if I post them, no one will like me anymore because my thoughts and feelings are abnormal. I only suss out emo posts to reassure myself I am normal, my thoughts and feelings, while not great, are also normal and I am not effing alone. Still not keen to hit publish though. You never know who lurks around this neck of the woods Xx
MAJOR DIFFERENCE! I bitch and moan at the best of times and it's not emo.
ReplyDeleteAhhh this is what guest posts are for... create the shit storm where your family can't see it
ReplyDeleteI started off anon... sometimes I wish I'd stayed that way, but can't change it now.
ReplyDelete'Coming out' is so scary, best of luck to you!
ReplyDeleteExactly. Sometimes I read other emo posts to not feel so alone, but... if I'm honest.. I read it and feel a little better about my own life and try to take it as a lesson not to take things for granted
ReplyDeleteI'd lean more towards stupid than brave ;-)
ReplyDeleteI agree with Woogs, major difference between a bitchy, moany post and a full on emo post. I'm quite partial to a bitchy rant :P
ReplyDeleteWhen I hear of people ending up in trouble with child protective services because someone has reported them after reading their blog I freak out. I think why the hell did I write that?!?!
ReplyDeleteThe orange car? If it's for the orange car then you should do it. I love your drafts x
ReplyDeleteThere is such a different level of comfort when you put it on someone else's blog! Even though the same people could find it, knowing that they just might not feels nice
ReplyDeletePublish then publish happy shiny :) I know that method well xxx
ReplyDeleteYour post haunts me, Miss Pink. I know the lines, and we are sisters x
ReplyDeleteYour analogy is brilliant, Toushka. CPR, love it. Now back to stabbing cookies (kinda like that no one knows what we're talking about now)
ReplyDeleteYou can always put them up here, Tara, my blog door (bloor) is always open.
ReplyDeleteThis is my feelings; I started blogging because I have no life. I suffer from major depression and chronic pain. I needed some place to let my emotions out. I only have 2 followers. So, I write what I want, when I want. Even though I did post something the other night (that I almost went back the next day & deleted), I left it up and it is still there. I DON'T care what people think, it's for me. If they like it and want to stay and follow, great! If they don't, that is fine too.
ReplyDeleteDo what you feel is right for you, not anyone else. It is YOUR space. If they can't handle it, they don't need to be there.
I've only just started blogging so haven't pulled a good Emo yet, although I am planning on pulling a faux Emo later in the month where I'll be discussing infertility and how I ate a pigeon to get pregnant. I did of course wait unti I was pregnant before I announce it to the world that I couldn't get pregnant hence I'm a big wuzzy wuzzy wuzz bag.... you're much braver.
ReplyDeleteI emo blog at times. Having Borderline & Bipolar means that sometimes, I get to the point where I have to emo blog a bit. I do have a somewhat secret blog that is seperate from everything that I sometimes delve deeper into just how emo I am, but I find that I'm pretty open about things on my blog.
ReplyDeleteMy fear is that the in-laws might get wind of what I've written about them. Holy shit, there isn't enough Xanax in the world to make that problem seem rosy!
ReplyDeleteAnd I can't see anyone taking Tricky away from you ;-) x
I'd rather read the truth than fluff any day.
ReplyDeleteDon't get me wrong. There are times when all I need is a good fluff piece to get motivated. However, I like the feeling that I am not alone in what I'm going through. So...emo away!
Emo blogging is pretty much all I do. I read it back and feel awful for whining so much, but its reality, you know? Everyone knows everything, even family who stalk me. I dont edit, dont put anything in the draft folder. Maybe I should!
ReplyDeleteEach one of us are made with uniqueness. In this world, we
ReplyDeletehave this what we called "freewill".
I use this freewill to express myself. I know some will not like it but still I will live with it because I'd
rather be hurt for being what I am than to be loved for being somebody else.
Pretending is living in a world of lies.