The Facebook Friend Conundrum

Over the years I've been on Facebook I've had my fair share of profile pictures.

When Tricks was born I put a photo of him up for the first two weeks so people could see that the little dude had arrived. Then I did it again during his first Christmas for a couple of days and again for a week when I photoshopped a microphone in to his hand and made him a rock star baby. Because, hello, everyone needs to see my mad photoshopping skills and our true blue, bogan roots.

I love youse all!

I have a little bit of an issue with people just putting their kids as their profile picture all the damn time. I want to scream at them "YOU ARE MORE THAN YOUR CHILDREN! DON'T LOSE YOUR IDENTITY" but getting all capslock cranky on someone's picture is deemed inappropriate and sure as shit will lead to an instant defriending.

I know, I know, your kid is adorable but c'mon, you are still a person ya know? Your definition is more than just mother/father.

Now despite this, honestly I couldn't really care less if you use your kid as your pic, do whatever floats your boat... unless of course you send me a friend invite and I have no freaking clue who you are, we have no mutual friends and any time we've had anything to do with each other you only referred to yourself by your relatively common first name. Who the hell are you? Help me out here!

And just so we're clear I'm not a child-hating "get your baby off Facebook" person, I think the same thing if your picture is a pet. Or a motorbike. Or an *insert other inanimate object here*.

So Christina Smith*, if you're reading this... I have no idea who you are. I'm sure you're lovely, but from your closed profile all I can tell is that you are a rather cute two year old boy with dimples that will break hearts one day. If by chance you're reading this, gimme a heads up, OK?

*Not her real name. Which totally doesn't help if she is reading this. Also, I'm very good at making up false names - Smith! Original!